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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29747019">actually your depressed/suicidal/angst techno needs (or otherwise techno centric oneshots)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsiniePerson/pseuds/AsiniePerson'>AsiniePerson</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Techno Depresso [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, But its a really bad attempt at fluff, Dadza, Dream SMP kinda, Fluff, Gen, Ghost Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Good Older Sibling Wilbur Soot, Good Younger Sibling TommyInnit, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Older Sibling Wilbur Soot, SHIPPERS DNI, Sad Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Suicidal Technoblade, Suicide Attempt, Technoblade Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, Younger Sibling TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), bruh, depressed Technoblade, everyone is probably ooc ik shush, how the fuck is that not a tag, i spiraled into a depressed episode lol, if those arent tags, im gonna MAKE it a tag, its not gonna all be angst, no beta we die like tommy in pandoras vault, philza is a good dad, please request im desperate, problematics dni, technoblade needs a hug, updates will be slow af, vibing to wilbur soot while writing this</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 22:07:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,999</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29747019</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsiniePerson/pseuds/AsiniePerson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>so uh I used to have a one shot book on wattpad but I don't use it much so now I'm using ao3, info on first chapter</p><p>(book is kinda dead)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Phil Watson &amp; Technoblade - Relationship, Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade, Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Techno Depresso [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2169582</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>167</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Information + Requests</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>okay so actually I like techno angst too much.</p><p> </p><p>request anything that isnt:</p><p>shipping, smut, x readers and x oc's (or ± reader and ± oc) </p><p> </p><p>I will do anything techno angst,try not to request dsmp since I'm not caught up. so uh, request or ill do it myself</p><p> </p><p>(p.s, i won't do every request in order. it takes lots of motivation and some just take longer than others.)</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. You Saved Me, I Save You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Techno almost commits suicide. Good thing Tommy awoke early.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, so this may be inspired by someone else (shinitai-san) and some other person, go check out their oneshot book if you haven't &lt;3</p><p> </p><p>TW: Self Harm Mentioned, Suicide Attempt, Mentions of Starvation, cursing, anything else I miss?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>There really wasn't anything else to say. Techno was most likely depressed, and 100% suicidal. He didn't really mind it at first, but it got considerably worse over time. And Tommy might be catching on. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He's only a child, stop being so obvious damn it-</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But he just can't </span>
  <em>
    <span>help </span>
  </em>
  <span>it. He needs help, he really does- Just, it feels so hard to ask for it, even the people closest to you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Just 20 minutes ago, he was lying in bed wondering if he should just </span>
  <em>
    <span>disappear. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He had a real hard time deciding, he loved his family but it felt like it'd make them happier if he just died. Then again, it could be false, but his anxiety creeps up, </span>
  <em>
    <span>'what if it isn't?'</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That thought wanders around his mind as he looks at his alarm clock. </span>
  <em>
    <span>'4 AM.' </span>
  </em>
  <span>It shouldn't be too early. Hopefully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tommy has college today, he'll be up early. But it's too early, it doesn't start until like 8 AM..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno throws the blanket off of him. The cold air suddenly hits him, forcing himself to get out of bed. It still gets colder by the minute, mentally slapping himself as he knows he's gonna have to wash his face with cold as fuck water. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He makes his way to the bathroom, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He looks terrible as hell. Dark heavy eye backs, light pink hair tangled everywhere, and oh lord the hair dye was starting to come off,  revealing chocolate brown hair. And in Techno's eyes, pink and brown don't go together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>First, he started off by washing his face. It was still cold, but surprisingly the water wasn't freezing. It felt rather refreshing. Then, he grabbed a hair brush. His hair was tangly, and it sorta hurt, but after some time he got used to it. Soon enough, his hair was back to it's silky state, something he hasn't felt in awhile. Few strands of hair were still sorta sticking out, but oh well, these are the consequences of long hair.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh! And he remembered his bandages.. Nevermind, he'll just take it off when he gets there.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno made his way out of the bathroom and started searching his closet. He found a red and black checkered sweater and just some black pants. He threw black scarf over his neck - just in-case.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He's now exiting his room, trying to be quiet so he doesn't awaken the rest of his sleeping family. Sometimes he had to stay in place cause he heard a noise, other than that he made it downstairs successfully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno didn't bother to eat and immediately put on his shoes. He was either gonna die or end up in the hospital, one way or the other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was 4:17 AM when he started to walk to.. somewhere. Somewhere he could probably jump. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Silence assisted Techno's morning walk, it was a bit odd since he lives in a pretty noisy household. He's not sure where he's going, anywhere is fine, for now he's just following the sidewalk. Somehow it was still a bit dark, but that doesn't matter right now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now he reached somewhere, he doesn't know where. There are buildings that are probably abandoned on his right, river on his left. A bridge was in the distance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He never really thought of drowning himself. It'd probably be an uncomfortable way to die, when you start to run out of oxygen your body's instinct is to go up for air, but no, you stay down and try to drown yourself while breathing in water. And he has long hair, it would stick to his face if he were to ever go up. Plus, the water is freezing and the feeling of your clothes sucking in water wouldn't be pleasant. </span>
  <b>(I'm really not sure how suicide by this would feel, I'm just stating how I think it'd feel, sorry if anything is wrong.)</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But now here he is. At a bridge, thinking if he should just jump. He didn't even get to write a letter to say goodbye, goddamn that shows how shitty he is. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno can't go back now though, it took a lot of courage to come here. Too much courage. Where'd it all go now that he's here? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno rolls up his sleeves and takes off his bandages, hissing at the exposed cuts that the cold air hit. He didn't bother to roll up his sleeves, who was gonna see him anyways? Deep breaths in and out</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>3..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>2..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>1.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span> "TECHNO?!" he heard as he was about to push himself forward. He recognized the british accent. Tommy. "Please just- please step back." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno couldn't kill himself in front of his brother, so he did as he was told and turned around. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why are you here? D-don't you have college?" Techno asked, eyes wide. Tommy looked scared, no, horrified and looked like he was about to cry. He never cried.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No, no. Mental health is more damn important than school, especially if it's my brothers." Tommy walked over to Techno, putting his hands on his shoulders and looking down at his arms. "Fuck.. How long has this been going on? Uh.. you don't have to answer." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The pinkette looked down. "Uhm.. about 3 years. I-It started with just not eating - uhm-" by then Techno was already tearing up and choking out his words. All his thoughts were racing and telling him </span>
  <em>
    <span>that Tommy is just 16, you're pathetic-</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why do you care.."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why do I care? Why do I care?!" , Tommy shouted a bit in disbelief but quieted down as he realized Techno shrunk a bit in size, "You- You're literally my idol Technoblade. I still remember when I was 5 and you found me, and you asked Phil if you could adopt me. Look, what I'm saying is- You literally saved my life! It's time for me to return that favor. So, uhm.. Let's go home now big man."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span> ___</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It's 7:16 A.M. Tommy is monitoring his sleeping brother. on the couch, as he doesn't trust his brother home alone while no one was awake. He already emailed his college professor since at this time he would be driving there already. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A door opened and Tommy knew it was Phil. The blonde was getting ready to get asked questions by his dad. Footsteps approached.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Tommy? Why aren't you at- oh.." Phil was about to ask before he looked at Techno and his bandaged arms. He went to sit on the couch with Tommy, instead whispering, "What happened?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, earlier.. I woke up since I heard the front door close. Then I saw Techno exit and saw this as a big red flag since I thought he was acting different these years, and he never goes out like that. And I panicked. So I got dressed for the weather as fast as I could. But I guess I took too long because at that time I didn't know where he was. Turns out he was at a bridge, got there before he jumped off." Tommy stumbled a bit with his words, "And he has an eating problem, and self harms.. I want to help- no, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>need</span>
  </em>
  <span> to help. But how? I don't wanna come off as insensitive."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Believe it or not, Techno was fake sleeping the whole time and smiled at that last line Tommy had said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"We'll need to start off with a light meal for Techno if he can't eat.. And we'll restrict him from any blades also. Might need to send him to a therapist, only if he wants to though.. Maybe a psychiatrist."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno sat up, "G'morning dad, g'morning Tom." he greeted although he was already awake.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Morning. So, erm, Tommy told me about this morning and uh.. Just know that we're always here. Give us a ring if you're troubled, alright?" Phil reassured. "Also, Tommy, can you get Wilbur down here? I also want to speak to him."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"WILBUR! GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Quiet down you're gonna wake the neighbors!" Techno couldn't resist the urge to smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Soon enough a tired Wilbur came downstairs, and flopped onto the couch that had the most space on it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After Phil spoke to him, Wilbur pulled Techno into a hug.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span> "Hey! I wanna join in too!" complained Tommy, joining in anyways, as Phil gets up to make breakfast.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Techno felt loved again.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm terribly sorry if I got anything wrong or just fucked this up. I'm not great at Hurt/Comfort.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. a/n</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>uhm.. do you mind if characters are ooc? im kinda insecure of my writing since i usually do ooc characters, lol</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. My Day Already Fucking Ruined by Sleep Deprivation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Thoughts catch up to him.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>..Not me ignoring requests and projecting onto Technoblade uhmm</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It's 1:30 AM.</p><p> </p><p>Every minute that passes by, he tosses and turns.</p><p> </p><p>He feels so empty, and then there's this urge to cry, but there's no particular reason for it. It's all so fucking pointless at this point, he's so tired. But he refuses to close his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Techno's arms ache so much, but he's tired of moving. He's especially hungry, he had absolutely nothing today. There's warmth engulfing him but it's too hot, remove it<em> and it's still too fucking cold.  </em></p><p> </p><p>He wants to tell someone, maybe he should. But as he reaches for the phone, he decides to stop. Techno always knows what's gonna happen, he's going to open Discord, get on the Sleepy Bois Inc. group chat but never say anything. Just him and all the anxiety creeps up, making him throw his phone to the side.</p><p> </p><p>There's another urge that just, try to ignore all those thoughts and <strike><em> please let me tell someone, I don't think I can hold up for much longer- </em></strike> try to be honest. Maybe he can lie about his mental health, but that's not the point, he's here for help. But after that he'll have to deal with the guilt later and-</p><p> </p><p>
  <strike> <em> IT'S JUST ALL TOO FUCKING OVERWELMING. </em> </strike>
</p><p>..there's really no escape from that. Always one problem after another.</p><p> </p><p>He turns back to the alarm clock, reading that it's only 1:37 AM. Techno feels so cold staring at the red numbers depicting time, he knows it's so late but he can't help it. </p><p> </p><p>And that urge to cry again is back. But it's much stronger this time, sometimes letting out coughs like he's about to cry, but nothing happens. It feels like so much might be happening so much at once, like he's trying to process a new feeling. </p><p> </p><p>He may actually cry.</p><p> </p><p>Everything seems gone, he's lost interest in almost everything, <em><strike> nothing matters and he's irrelevant to this world</strike>. </em>He brings his legs up, and it's starting to get warm again. His eye lies are so heavy, and he's on the verge of giving up.</p><p> </p><p>It's only like one to two hours on the actual day, and everything is already fucked up.</p><p> </p><p>It's time to go to bed. <strike> <em> Finally time to get away from reality. </em> </strike></p><p> </p><p>Tomorrow is another day, hopefully it'll treat him better. But he can only dream about that, he shuts his eyes, time to get this ruined day over with because of a horrible as fuck sleep schedule.He</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> 1:56 AM, time goes by quickly. </em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hi. sorry this is short. but im tired and sad right now. sorry once again.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. a few incorrect quotes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>HEYYYY SORRY I'VE BEEN GONE FOR SOLONG</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dream to Sapnap: are you the cause of global warming? Cause you're hot<br/><em>few seconds later</em><br/>Sapnap: <em>FURIOUSLY TRYING TO STUFF HIMSELF IN THE FREEZER</em></p><p> </p><p>Dream to George: did it hurt when you fell from the vending machine? Cause you look like a snacc</p><p>George, pouring rat poison all over himself: WHAT ABOUT NOW?</p><p> </p><p>(taken from my other incorrect quote book from another fandom, family au)</p><p>Philza: if your friend jumped off a cliff, would you?</p><p>Tommy: NO! THAT BITCH CAN GO DIE!</p><p>Wilbur: maybe.</p><p>Techno: I DON'T HAVE FRIENDS!</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
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